Case 39

Editorial

With all the flair of stonewash jeans, German director Christian Alvart makes his Hollywood debut with an "is-the-creepy-kid-possessed?" horror movie that marches so plainly to the beats of every other "is-the-creepy-kid-possessed?" horror movie it has no hope of drumming up a reason to be.

Shot back in 2006, Alvart's paint-by-numbers work has since been on the shelf, perhaps only finding this release in an attempt to extract what mileage there is from Bradley Cooper being so hot right now and before people forget who Bridget Jones and Al Swearengen are.

A case can be made that this should've been left to collect dust. After family services ace Emily (Zellweger) rides in to save the creepy polite kid (Tideland's Ferland) from creepy disturbed parents, little time is wasted on red herrings, tension or conflicts of interest. Instead, the little tyke's true nature is quickly made known, while our heroine survives only because, conveniently, unstoppable murderous evil sometimes forgets how to do its job.

Ian McShane and Mr Hangover stop by to recite their share of dusty obviousness as The Omen, The Exorcist, Poltergeist, Orphan and other superior scary sprats are blended into banality.

True, Zellweger once was a big-screen drawcard, but this paltry psych-terror turkey accelerates her slide from grace. It's best suited to home viewing. Where you can turn it off.

Zach Gibson